Norris City Kids Church | LOL Conference
But we’re excited to be here with you guys, we, we are kind of big fans of having fun our goal and we just kind of set up our family goal that we want to raise em, jesus, loving, productive members of society that actually serve Norris City Kids Church, love, god and like us when they get older enough that they want to come back and visit our house. So that’s our goal, and so part of that is to just make it really fun. We try to make life fun for kids. We try to make Norris City Kids Church fun for our kids. I know all of life isn’t fun and just like brian said it’s not all about being happy, but if you can make it fun in the work and you can make it fun in the process, then it just makes for a lot more joyful household, and some of you are out there today and he just really. He need some joy back in your deal like you just been fighting and I was funny at lunch. A guy was saying that he had a dream that he was coming here today and that when he got here, we called out all the things that he haddone and just we’re really awful to him. So we want you to come stand right here, we’re going to got some things. The lord showed me about you, prophetic ministry. Will we call you all one by one and tell you your deepest darkest secrets. Just getting so it’s going to be for the rest of the session. We will do nothing but correct. You want to make it fun, because if you can have fun in the process, then god can really change your heart and change your life whenever we let the devil’s that all the fun in the joy out of being married supposed to be a pleasurable thing. It’s when god found out of in the guard me. So it’s not good for him to be alone. I want to give him a helper, that’s comparable to him and he brought them together so that they wouldn’t be alone. One of the biggest parts of marriage is to cure loneliness and to give you a partner in life that you aren’t compatible with that you run in this life with and so I tell single Norris City Kids Church all the time. I say:don’t try to find somebody just run the race and if there ever shows a guy or girl up beside you, that’s running as fast as you are in the exact same direction, grab their hand miriam and go like it. That’s it’s not about slowing down for some. What are you it’s about running the race that god has for you? So if you could already find someone, that’s training in the run, it’s a lot more fun like a medicine. Somebody say amen to that. I will say it’s an honor to get to service an overseer and tell the relationship I have with your pastor and I’ll. Tell you it’s a lot of work, keeping him in line. It says it’s full time, but but we have him within an armbar right now. I’ll say he does he’s the same. For me, I have three men that that I I give you authority over my life too, and let him speak in my life. They could. They can correct me anyway. They want to I’m, open I’m submissive. Tell me what I need to know how many we need some help in life. Man I know, I need some help and I like to submit myself to guys that bitter in my van they’re doing what I’m doing some of them a few years older than me got a little further down the road some of her peers, but I just want their voice and I want their input and I’m telling you from where I’m sitting I said it earlier, but you’ve got one of the most pure hearted pastors in america. Just so give the lord, walmart and clouds for what he’s bless this house? Will you have something special in supernatural hear you you really really do and that we started talking jessie? Now we don’t set much when we teach dewey. These guys are well I guess when you’re 7 foot tall, you said down it’s all right, but for me, I disappear when I sat down up here, but I’ll say this. We’re talkin about marriage is a garden. Everybody say, marriage is a garden and we started talking about marriage being a garden and what we’re going to so with what we’re going to grow in our life and there’s weeds to pull in there’s water to be poured on the garden there’s fertilizer. We have to put out there on the guard and there’s also some trouble in the garden from time to time. You look at him and either replace in a garden. God gave them some commandments told them what to do in the garden said. Listen! This is your garden to tend to and to keep I like this man had a job before the fall. Work is not a product of a fallen world system. Work is the intention of god and I believe that humanity is the best we’re at work. I’ll tell you I’m the best. Whenever I have a mountain to climb, whenever I have a giant to kill whenever I have something to do, but whenever my wife becomes dangerous is when there’s not something for me to put my hand to to work. My grandpa used to say this brian. If you ever get unemployment-and you have nothing to do right now, y’all to go work for someone for free, while you’re unemployed cuz, you won’t spend the money, you would be spending when you were bored and you won’t get yourself in trouble, send won’t, kill you. We are designed to work, everybody say work, so they’re working in the garden and god gives them some some things they can and can’t do he says, listen everything! I have we got a good father? He says everything that I have out here.
You see all the trees, you see all the fruit, you see all of the food you take any of it. You want it’s yours, but then god said there’s some trees in the stairs. In the center of the garden you eat of the fruit of a tree in the center of the garden, you shall surely die. There was some spiritual principles put out right there in the garden. God was going, keep that portion for himself. It was his everything else could be man’s and here’s what happened in the garden that caused the real trouble. A lot of the trauma lot of trouble, a lot of the problems we seeing like whatever you turn on the news and you see war, you see genocide. You seem natural disasters, you see things like this. All of it stems from an action in the garden that started in genesis, chapter 3, verse, 1. You could open up your bibles to genesis, chapter 3 and verse 1 and here’s what’s happening in genesis, chapter 3 and verse one. It says this that’s way up at the beginning, y’all to find out quickly. You know, what’s up it’s the part of the bible genesis chapter 3 that we actually read through the first of the year before we blow or read the bible in one year plan of the first 10 chapters of genesis. Somebody say amen to that:you don’t know I’m an expert in this chapter, so this is before I give up now quit. So this is what it says:genesis chapter 3, the word of god yo, just got called to 21 days of prayer and fasting when I leave but genesis reversal, and it says this, it says:there’s now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the lord god has made, and he said to the woman has god indeed said:you shall not eat of every tree of the garden when stop right. There first thing it says it says the serpent was more cunning, more crafty than any other beasts of the field. How many other we have an enemy in our life. John 10:10 says that the thief comes to steal, to kill and destroy, but I have come that you might have life that you might have hold and possessive in abundance. I’m thankful for the life that jesus has offered us so I’m believing for the life I’m. Looking for the life I’m working for the life receiving the life by grace, but also i, know this I know that there is an enemy to my sold as well, and if there’s an enemy line around her head around and I’m, not aware of his presence. What’s the most dangerous things you can have in your life is an unidentified enemy. One of the most dangerous things you can have in your life is an unidentified anime. You read through the life of jesus you’ll see there was a judas there. Now jesus was better than us cuz. He knew who do this was from the beginning, but in life you can have a judas hanging around and you haven’t even identify them. Yet, as a natural person living in a natural flow in life and those unidentified enemies, they cause trouble and I believe that serpents are still trying to slither into the garden of our marriage. So we have to be able to identify. We have to be able to understand what that is, and we have to know that we have authority to crush the head of the serpent that was given to us on calvary’s cross 2000 years ago. I don’t have to put up with any snakes in my garden anymore, cause somebody give god a hand, clap for his authority and our lives. We don’t have to be under the devil, sway anymore. She got to know their serpent. You take care of in the garden when she was a young girl, was walking through the woods and struck twice by water moccasin, so my whole entire life. My mom obviously had a natural, a version, two snakes and she never wanted us anywhere near them, even if they were pets or anything. But we begin to build this garden in the back of our house and my mom’s on the phone. Just constantly keep briley out of that garden keep her away from that guards. She want her anywhere near that garden. She wanted her and she didn’t want it. She said watch for snakes, I want you to watch for snakes, build anything in my backyard I like a place that she’s always so you got to check that place that she has like a version to any kind of snake around right. Well, the thing is that there was as good reason it’s because she ran into one wants that she didn’t see coming and she wishes that someone would have been at that path. Looking for what actually ended up being an enemy to her and it came at her, but it didn’t just come once it came twice to the devil. Doesn’t just stop what he’ll come at you as many times as he can get to you, and he wants to take your marriage out. The bible says that god hates divorce because he desires godly, see the devil, loves divorce, because he knows that it gives the your seed less of a chance of succeeding in jesus. If he can break apart the marriage you can break apart, the family can break apart the family, he can break the children apart, and so it creates all these hurdles and he creates chaos there. Breaking us up, so if we know that we have an enemy and where we have our I peel we’re watching waiting knowing and it’s easier if we know what they look like right. If you know what the enemy looks like, it gets easier to identify if you’re, if you’re watching-and you have your eyes open to today.
We just want to talk about a few of the snakes that slither into the garden and look at your neighbor and tell him to say the only good snake is a dead snake. Just tell him that get over here Norris City Kids Church talk about all it’s a good snake. It’s a free place thing I’m like there’s, no such thing as a good snake, less it’s a dead snake, a man when I see snakes i, don’t even tell him what the hell I shoot them from across the yard. You know, i, don’t know if it’s poisonous or whatever, but it’s dead for told my property. That’s what I deal with the snake and I’ll tell you I was thinking of you went over here before and I know. The Norris City Kids Church supports it financially, but that’s a life impact international with lana vasquez. Is anybody in here ben, ben, joe, nolana or she’s minister hear some I’ll tell you. She was incredible. Woman of god has a great work for kids at risk in the sex slave or rescued out of a sex slave trade, so matter-of-fact catherine, duker rider on the front row. She been our Norris City Kids Church for 10 11 years, i. Think about how long time now and does she spent a couple of years over there as a missionary you’ll give catherine I am clap great girl, she’s getting married by the way she’s engaged she’s getting married. So we made her come today or just her already, but impact, and there were some kids are going to be water baptized and that they wanted me to water baptized, these kids and so I’m like we’re going to water baptized. These kids and lana says well, there’s some water right over here and i, going to look where she’s talking about, and it’s like 6ft straight down and all this brush into this dirty-looking ditch witch hunter on the side of the land I’m like you want to baptize them and then she’s like yeah and I’m like okay. You know the farm kid I can roll with it whatever and the next day, we’re driving onto the land in this giant snake comes right across the road I’m on an end of the water I was going to, but sometimes the kids on the next day. So. What kind of snake was that one of the guys are? So that’s a king cobra not like we’ll be baptized most kids somewhere else tomorrow. I am calling an audible on this deal. Man cuz, if i, don’t know that snakes there that she knows I’m there or not. I want to get the jump almost hear. Some snakes I believe that we need to get the jump on in life, and these are snakes. That’ll destroy your garden. It’ll mess you up, you got a thority over me. You got to kill him snake is this:is the snake of infidelity? Absolutely you better kill it before it grows, because that snake will sneak up on you. We talked a little bit about it in the last session, but infidelity. Well, it’s huge and a lot of times. Norris City Kids Church think you know if I am not having we like to label it, an affair cuz that just sounds a lot prettier than it sounds cleaner than just infidelity. Just you know just not being loyal to your spouse. In a lot of times, Norris City Kids Church say you know:i never have had a physical relationship with that person in person there. So many ways is now to ensure way around the subject and still kind of stay where you can have you know where your you think you’re getting both worlds at the same time, because social media has erupted on the scene and we love it because we can use it for god and the gospel, but it is also become an incorrect. You know that phenomenon of Norris City Kids Church going to their high, school reunions and somehow their spouse had to work and they couldn’t make it to the high school or union and they said honey. You go ahead and you go to the high school reunions. It’s such a dumb thing to do, but I mean it happened in almost every time it happens. What happens you get there and you remember:that. I used to be a football player and you were in love with him and he never paid you the time of day. But now he’s been through two marriages and he’s bald and he’s like hey hun. How are you and the next thing you know the two of them have hooked up in the hotel that they had the high school over union in and the marriages are busted on both sides, and it was all for one night because of a memory that you have someone that doesn’t even exist anymore. Cuz he’s bald. Now you know what she told me and I love you too, but this is something that’s in you, then Norris City Kids Church’s brains, that they think they all don’t like me. Now I know I’m, sorry, i, don’t even know where to go from there home. That’s where you go from there. You go home who’s in illustration about the bible says. If you love the word, you won’t be offended, so we’re going to go with that I’m. So sorry, I was about illustration, and forgive me this is one of the moment. You get an opportunity for forgiveness, i, don’t know what! If I even talk to you about, show me high school reunions, social media I’m, going to get back on it, i, just thinking being bald, is so much better than having like chia pet hair, though right, so we could do that for a while, but then I’m going to spend all the Norris City Kids Church that had that, so we’re just going to start over okay. So if you, if you have this moment in time wherever it, but the thing is that used to happen like once a year once every 5 years, once every 10 years, whatever your were union happened at, but now it’s happening every afternoon, so you’re getting off work or you’re still at work or whatever and you’re scrolling through that feed and all of a sudden, joe schmo.
That was this awesome football player that you never got the time of day from is still the same. Guy only he’s on social media every single day, and so your phone has your attention. Everything social media has created this new aspect of what it is for us to have these moments in time. Where we invest are emotion and we invest our time and we even invest physical acts, and then we meet up with Norris City Kids Church and then the next thing. You know you a sexual affair with this person and Norris City Kids Church try to ride it. Although it was just an emotional affair, it was an affair, it was, it was infidelity and we can guard our self. We can crush that snake under our foot. If we will do specific things, including what we didn’t hit in the last session, which was the seed of intimacy and it’s the last seed that we must plant in our garden, it’s huge for your marriage and I think it’s one of the biggest things that the devil fights against, and this is why, because the devil knows, if he can still intimacy, he can still everything intimacy means two different things. When I just said that women totally went another direction with it, then mend it I’m telling you two totally different worlds. Women went to having a conversation that they were sharing their soul. You know, I was arguing like that:marvin gaye, song, let’s, get, it, on, let’s, get, it, on, intimacy I just want to sing now and timothy dance, just two totally different worlds. I was just two totally different world, and so, even if women love sex, they really intimacy is not sex for them, even if they’re having a great time, even if they enjoy that. Even if your marriage has a great sex life, you are in an area now where women do not consider intimacy. That’s considered physical affection to women most of the time. I don’t mean to overgeneralize, but for the majority of the population, that is how that is received in their brain. Whenever I say that they’re they’re, talking about having conversations about life will go out in and out, we do have big big big at san tan dating, like we believe in the date save the date. You guys cuz I’m telling you. If you will treat each other like friends and have friendship, then you will have a better chance of getting to have sex. So we we love that we reserve one night a week. Every single week, brian I go out together, come high, water or anything else. Brian and I are out on a date on a certain night and it is set it’s blocked out of our calendar. No one gets in it. You have to die or be in the er with something massive that no one else to leave. Do. You got any clothes and i, so it is. It is the thing it is the principal thing in our home. We we walk out sunday morning. We block out wednesday night and we block out date night and family night, and then we block out the other things that we have to block out and then any of our spare time that anyone want. We give it to him, because we love Norris City Kids Church and we say yeah. We can do that, though you what yeah, okay and we get to give those times away, but these are times that we block out for our family, because it’s intimacy that has to be between us, and that only happens if we’re having the kind of intimacy that means intimacy to a woman and the kind of intimacy that means intimacy to a man wear to be intentional and here’s the thing about about jesse and i. Wait we live together. We work together. We minister together we’re doing this right here when we’re together a lot. Sometimes it’s like if I have any more together with you, I’m well, i, don’t know what we’re going to do and we love each other. She wants to go. You know it’s like reaching out this weekend. Can you stay home? You can almost think being together is being intimate, but it’s not the same thing right being together and being intimate, are two different things, and so as a as a I’m, still a young guy, but as a a really young pastor I pioneered a Norris City Kids Church, I was 26 getting ready to turn 27. She was, she was 23. We were old, wise pastors, then you know we had. We had a lot to say, but I’m driven young guy, all I can think about is getting things done. I mean I was obsessive, I could never turn off. Work I had a day off and she would catch me I’d, be in the closet, with the door shut, doing business on my phone. She opened the door and I’ll be in there and she’s like what are you doing tonight? Nothing looks like I’m just hanging out in an album with you she’s. She starts to tell me she wasn’t bad about. It was like brian we need to. We need to connect, we need to spend more time and I wasn’t getting it for a long time. I think a lot of guys are here because I was like man we’re together all the time. How can we spend any more time together? But just because I’m in the room does not mean I’m being intimate just because you’re there with your family doesn’t mean you’re there for your wife come on. Somebody are there out there, two different things. So what what really nice, I’m sorry and the wife that you get outside of the homes when women are home all were thinking about his kids in the next laundry load that has to come out in that dinner and why those dishes aren’t done yet and let having the kids do their chores in that homework has to be done and all these things are going on to do yourself a favor and remove your wife from her motherhood, place and I were even just if you’re, if you’re, older and still married, but you don’t children in the house anymore or maybe you don’t have any children yet remove her for her home is a place of work.
So when you remove your wife from that place, you give her an opportunity to just beat your friend to be your girlfriend, to be your wife to be that connector person and have a relationship with you it it’s something that is psychological. That happens when you remove them from that environment. We learn this and I think it helped us big time and I’ve heard pastors teach this all older ministers to. What’s this that every 7 days you need to have a date. Everybody say every 7 days to be a big money. It don’t have to be a big spend. Some Norris City Kids Church are saying:mana I can’t afford that we can’t go out. It could be as simple as going for a ride together in the car and split in a milkshake. You know what I mean it’s it’s about time, it’s not about what you spend it’s not about surf and turf, it’s about connecting with your spouse, and then some Norris City Kids Church are saying:i. Don’t have anybody to watch my children so like who would want to watch chad everett children there’s like 25 of them, so i, don’t know where you get. Somebody to watch him all the time he’s like who’s, watching your kids I’m like there’s a guy that lives under the bridge in owensboro and never has anything to do so. I’ll drop them off down there, and so, but here’s what you can do if you can’t get someone like that for those of you that still have kids I have a little kid. You know 10-6 and we have another one pop or 6. Something like that. So we’ll do this week, the date every 7 days, and if you can’t afford somebody to watch your kids, you can make out work out a swap with another couple that make sense. They watch one time you watch the next until you get it right. Every 7 days we say we like to do a a weekend or every 7 weeks or an overnight something every 7 weeks, I took a couple of months. That’s harder to pull off. Do you work it out start with 7 days, then, when you get get your flow and if it will depend on where your financial deal is that that way we can get away for a day and that’s big for us, because we’re pastors in our community, and so it doesn’t matter if we go out in our community and we sit down at a table lot of times-will be a line of Norris City Kids Church waiting to talk to me and I love them for him. I want to minister to him I’m here to minister of the community, but if i, don’t minister to this, I won’t be able to minister to the community cuz. This won’t exist anymore. So it’s a big for me if i, if I’m dining in owensboro I’m, not with my family, with my wife I’m with the community most of the time, it’s so consistent out on the night. That is our date night and our members will walk up in the bell said nevermind because they know like this is off-limits. This is our this is our moment and this and we were talking to each other. We got phones in the car, we have eyes connected on one another. We are having a conversation and and I just think it’s something when we first started this, it was like I was so starved for it because it had been so many years since we had had that intimacy, and so it was, it was huge for me. You know that we had this moment and I think sometimes guys get overwhelmed. Cuz. It’s like! Oh, my god romance every 7 days. Are you kidding me? This is exhausting, you know, but the more that your regular about it that low just list, because I feel like women whenever we know that it’s coming when we look forward to it. When we know it’s going to be a regular occurrence, then that, like panic, that it’s not going to happen getting you have to do it all right, this time kind of just like goes away, and then it doesn’t have to be candles and roses and chocolates, and all the things that everybody says on the movies, every single time, it’s nice. When that does happen, but a lot of times it’s just really cool to just get to hold your spouse’s hand and drink a milkshake together and just have a real conversation that doesn’t include words like poop I mean it’s, it’s just a wonderful, wonderful experience and it lowers the expectation level and then, as that happens, the husband begins to really start to enjoy a kind of intimacy that he never really thought that he had any need for and as that rises in his life than they begin to connect on a different level. When that happens, I’m just going to tell you guys. This is the key to the man kind of intimacy and it is a whole new world where men are in not only fighting a cell’s enjoying some of that. They never thought they even wanted, but they are finding a woman that is connected to them in a way that is, makes her so much more open to physical intimacy like she said first, when we started initiating that she was somewhat star for it. Now, honestly, sometimes date nights are like this:we’ll go eat. Something together, then we’ll go to the movie and she’s like i, want to watch this chick flick. But why don’t you go? Watch the war movie. Cuz I know you don’t watch this, so we get our popcorn. We go to the movies and I’ll never have to watch the notebook as long as to live or anything like it come on. That’s a blessing. You guys all get the lord of hand, clap for that.
You do this for a couple years and up so there’s, there’s date, high, sometimes you’re talking and you’re. Speaking in chinese, fully communicating like you’re an awesome, communicator you’re, just a communicator in chinese and your spouse, they only speak english, so I have no clue and they think you didn’t talk to him all week and you think you port your guts out to up and then you’re just so aggravated so cute. That’s because they’re full of a different lady left a different way. Everyone has a different language, so she can get that book and invest in your marriage. That would be really good for you, the first text we we read in genesis. It said the man of the woman. They were in the garden, they were naked and they were not ashamed gained 35 pounds since we got married. So when I make it a little bit of shame, but you know just saying just a little bit of shame now what does part of the problem? But what it’s talking about? One of the first things god establishes in the garden after after he talks about creating them. Is it sexuality and were created to be sexual beings, and there’s probably an age in here where some of you, if you’re over certain age or getting uncomfortable with this kind of talk in Norris City Kids Church, because things that used to be taboo and culture aren’t really any more and more i? Think the Norris City Kids Church has to recognize is that if we don’t educate or talk to Norris City Kids Church Norris City Kids Church about sexuality and sex, there’s a snake out there in the garden somewhere? That will try to talk to them about sexuality and sex. Every single person is walking around with a porn machine in their pocket. Absolute, it’s right here, and women at the highest levels, known in history of humanity, are getting addicted to pornography men, highest levels in the history addicted to pornography, and it’s because at any given moment you can ignore every bit of reality tap right into this phone. You don’t even have to go and try to find a magazine anymore. You turn this phone on in the devil, has a snake waiting for you and that gardens. You know the cultures gotten so dark concerning sexuality and I’m, not even talking about gender-specific things here. Let’s just talk about the view of casual sex. I read an article this week and it was talking about millennials and they’re they’re born in the mid-eighties and after and they say somewhere between 60 to 70% of millennials, now think it’s okay or appropriate to have casual sex with someone before the first date 60 to 70% before the first date, and you just think about that and think about. Like the the cultural issues, the disease, the heartbreak, the the working together ending a part of so many Norris City Kids Church, man we’re going to have those of you in the marriage counseling business you’re going to have next level were coming to do in the body of christ in the next several generations. So the need to talk about sexuality and sex is massive. Did the apostle paul said this? We talk about intimacy and if you want to kill or infidelity I think number one day you know you got to have this intimacy jesse it’s talking about, and now you also have to have sexual intimacy. The bible says this paul says whenever a man and a woman get married, that their body is not their own. Jesse’s body no longer belongs to her in the scripture says now that we’re one her body belongs to me, and my body no longer belongs to me, but she’s, the lucky owner of all of this right. Now you got all this to love, darling and there’s more me over here. So she gets all this and the scripture says that you’re not to defraud one another, and that means that you’re not to have it’s almost like false advertising. I’ll just say this:guy’s don’t go into marriage to not have sex, guys, don’t go into marriage to not have sex and there’s a lot of sexless marriages. Help in a sexless marriage is a ticking time bomb, just to listen that bit that gots wire to have that kind of expression of that kind of function in females are as well and and end with the amount that outlet without that that sexual expression, it is a ticking time bomb and it’s massive I say to me:jesse our sex life is just terrible and I will ask them how many books have you read? Not how many magazines have you looked at? How many books have you read on the function and how to have good sex and I’ll, say I’m, a christian, i, say and I will ask you again how many books have you read because I don’t know? If you know this or not, but as believers, we should have the best sex lives of anyone in the entire it in the entire world. God created made it us to function like this, and then he has equipped us with echo. It says that we hate we have an abundance for every good work. That god has given us the ability that we had that we have an unction of the holy one and we know all things they jesse. Why are you mixing scripture with this talk about sex because it is holy as unto the lord I mean the marriage bed, the bible says is undefiled it in the end, because there’s so much perversion outside of this world Norris City Kids Church are Norris City Kids Church, look at it and I think of it as a filthy thing or as a as a thing that we shouldn’t talk about her as a taboo subject, but god was never taboo with it. He was very open about the fact that the marriage bed is undefiled and that we were supposed to give our bodies free lie to one another, but the problem is:is christian believers we haven’t taken the time to study it.
I mean I’m, telling you. If you get a guy who likes to hunt, he knows everything about hunting. He not me. They put some kind of weird spray that is urine on the I mean it isn’t they know exactly where that rifle is going to shoot. They know exactly how far they need to be from there from the animal that they’re trying to kill. They know if they’re bowhunters there they they were like target, practicing constantly making sure that everything’s right I mean I’ve been around of its constant all the time. That’s all they’re talking about they’re buying clothes to get better at it, you’re being weird urine spray to get better at it, they’re buying a different kind of ammunition or buying a different kind of of weapon. But then you ask him if they read anything about sex in like no, no, like my wife, never wants to have it’s like yeah, that’s cuz, you’re, not very good at it yet graduation to become your hubby. If you learn nobody likes you and you don’t know how to have sex with awful session now stand up here and we’re going to tell everybody you’re saying it’s:alright, we have women on the other side who have been taught their entire lives that they can just get anything that they want by refraining from having sex. My mom told me, and my grandma told me that if I didn’t like what was going on in the house, just tell him they’re not have any more sex until they do. What I ask him to do so, we’re manipulating through sex. The bible says that manipulation is as the sin of witchcraft. So basically you just turn to witchcraft and now you’re expecting god to bless your marriage and it’s so bizarre, and so opposite of anything that god created yet I say the word sex in that makes you nervous, but witchcraft doesn’t make us nervous we’re completely comfortable with that. We can talk about that over coffee with our girlfriends, but if we say anything about sex inside the marriage covenant, then it makes us uncomfortable so I want us to be renewed in the spirit of our mind about these things because of perversion because of sin, because of all of these things that are available returning to things that are so filthy and defiled and they’re, trying to spice up their marriage with these things that are so outside of anything that god had for us. If, if you’re not hurting your spouse, if there is no other person in the bedroom, if there is not any kind of anything that would harm the other one or anything like that, then you should just have fun in the marriage bed and enjoy the life that god has given you say:jessie I do not want to do that. I, do not like it. I understand that there are Norris City Kids Church, I mean they’re Norris City Kids Church that have been through abuse, and there are Norris City Kids Church that have been through hard times, and some of you are in marriage is right now, where you’re going through forgiveness process about an affair that was had, while you were in your marriage, covenant and I’m, not at all trying to throw out a blanket statement and degrade the amount of trauma that you’ve experienced in your life, but I’m talking about marriages that are saying. Okay, we have things we have hold up, but we are willing to try and we are willing to make an effort and we are willing to make sex are hobby for the next year. We are both going to make sex are hobby. Do you know that sex is free, it’s cheap, you can be broke and you can have sex, because if there’s nothing else to do, that’s that’s free. You know it’s a wonderful buffet, so if it got gave it to us it’s there so that we at some point have to come face-to-face with somebody and say I’m going to be kind enough to you to try to get you to have sex with me and got did that on purpose because he wanted it to be a regular event. So we get this question a lot bryan. How often do in this is the wrong verbiage, but we get it all the time. How often do I have to have sex when do I have to have sex? It’s like it’s a root canal. You know what is the question? How often do I have to have sex? It’s like how much do I get to have sex? That’s right! It’s probably a change in the way. You think and I thought I’d say this. She said it earlier than a sexless. Marriage is a ticking time bomb and I’ll talk to guys there they’re my age or younger than me, and it don’t they’ll be like pastor, my wife had sex. She tells me know all the time and now maybe that guy was not taken care of the other side. Marriage, but all all you can do is fix what you can fix in your marriage. Both sides were marriage right, but I can give it a shape to do everything. I can do to make my side of the marriage work and then listen. If that person wants to go crazy and runs off whatever. Would it be better? Builder lay down the end of your life and say:i did everything that I knew to do and I tried everything within my power and so so with the sex thing. How often should I get to to to do it or whatever? And it’s like it’s like a sexless marriage-is a ticking time. Bomb I got gas and it’s been 6 months. It’s been 9 months and I’ll say this. If you don’t have sex with your spouse, someone else will that excuse their behavior, but you just stacked the odds and the deck against them and if I won’t have sex with my spouse, sometimes jesse will make me mad and in my flesh, I’m, like I’m, cutting you off from now to tell you what it’s over can I tell if ryan can I can I give them the snow out there that it’s tempting you sexually outside of your your spouse.
You got a fence. Them out, got a fence I’m out right, that’s right what what it? What did joseph do whenever potiphar’s wife came on to him here and he ran cuz, you can’t win with that type of temptations. You stay in the room with it, not much jesus, loved and spirit-filled god, but I know myself and I know males in general. If you stay in that room, you lose, she got to get. You got to get out of the room. The only way you went, it’s not willpower, it’s it’s, creating a border in a parameter and another way to take on sexual temptation off of your spouse and guys are more site or in it and in their driven. That way is i. Think if you have sex every day, you’ll be so tired of somebody. Come talk to you. It’s like man, I play checkers with you, but I’m, not upset. I’m, just I’m, just kidding. I got to hang out regularly come on. Well, it’s proven scientifically that about every 48 hours men are created to have 72 hours that men are created to have another at their bodies, create what it takes to have another sexual experience, so I feel like if god creates that in men, every 72 hours, probably a pretty good at stretch. So if you want to take that-and oh my goodness, do you have any idea? Yeah I do I have 21 loads of laundry every week. I get it but I’m just telling you that if you want to have the god kind of marriage-and you want a fence out the snake of infidelity, then you will give yourself to being intimately involved with that person. And what I have found is that the more that women will give of themselves to their husband, the more they enjoy, giving their self to their husband, i, seen it over and over and over hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of couples that we have worked with, that I see that begin to really approach their spouse with a desire for them. Not just will you do this with me, I guess so, let’s get this over! I have somewhere to be, but actually like, say yeah sure you know, and then and then they like it there they’re both friends at the end of the thing and they haven’t created this explosive deal. The lord gave us intimacy physical, intimacy and emotional intimacy so that we would come together and dwell together in unity so that tempers wouldn’t rise, but that they would fall so that aggravation would go down. So it all of these things. When you have sex, endorphins are released. All of the all of the the happy chemicals that go to your brain are released. All the bonding chemicals that you need to get closer to someone are released. All of these things that god created our bodies to do work in line with our obedience and whenever we begin to pursue that the body be even begins to desire that more and more so, it’s super important that you guys are taking a lot of time on this point. It is because money and sex are the number one things that Norris City Kids Church are going to get divorced over and they fight over it. They talk about it. Every single person that we talked to, that has marriage difficulty. It is money or sex, I’m, telling you every single time and they’re fighting in their badly and they’re spending. So much energy and like do you guys know that with the same energy you just fought for one hour, you could have had sex and saved self. All of this stress actually come out at 8. You know what better at the end, and so we try to encourage them to funnel the emotion funnel the anger subtle. All of these, these heightened emotions into something that’s productive in their marriage instead of something that destroys it last thing, I’ll say in this is about adultery proofing. Your marriage is the jessie and we have a deal. We call it our spider sense, you make all the holy spirit, but whatever you want to say, you’re nowhere, but if there’s somebody in our world sucks somebody getting close to us around, maybe in the Norris City Kids Church, maybe a friend from town might be the places we go, and one of us thinks that the other person has some illinois attention. Ill intentions towards our spouse, like if I think, there’s a guy that that’s got it for jesse and he’s getting too close, or she thinks there’s a girl. That’s out there, that’s up to no good. We say one thing to the other one and that person is gone from being close to us in life. One thing we don’t fight about it:we don’t talk it out, not as he says, I think she’s up to no good. She. She, she grieves my spirit, I think she’s got some ill intent intention and man I got. We got to protect this before we protect anything else, and so then it’s gone it’s out and we may be right. We may be wrong, but that’s just something:we’re going to do to protect our marriage right, 2nd snake. That was worth the price of admission at that segment. Second, snake wheeled kills a snake of control and I’m, not just talking about about any kind of control. I’m talking about unnatural control that hurts marriages, unnatural control, you can watch it x guys, I’ve seen guys will come extremely controlling in a marriage. I remember there was a guy that so control this family. We knew in ministry that he would be out on the road traveling that ice cream up in the refrigerator and the kids and the wife will have to call and ask if it’s okay, if they had some of the ice cream before they ate it after the meal.
While the guy was on the road-and it’s like, does a person like that function in life, how can you live with that level of control now watch guys they control? Sometimes jesse was talking about it earlier that that women, and then sometimes me, will control through withholding sex, but guys they control a different way. A lot of them will control the environment through rage, violence, harsh words. You know the guy that runs around the house. Like a silverback ape punching holes in the drywall blowing, it stopped going wild. What? Why would somebody? Why would somebody do that’s at least christ-like behavior you could ever have? Will that god didn’t get his way in to talk or in life or whatever, and so now he has to resort to acting like a neanderthal to establish dominance in his house and and there’s a lot of Norris City Kids Church that do this, and a lot of younger guys may even be more given to this because of testosterone because of bad models, and maybe they they get too tired, as life goes on. But if you’re doing something like that, it’s such an abusive environment it’ll destroy the covenant in the trust that god’s putting together in there-and it’s just like this I’m I’m in I’m, in charge of my house hold’em in charge of jessie, ultimately I’m in charge of the kids, but just cuz I’m in charge or I’m. The leader doesn’t mean I have to be in control of everything. Somebody say amen to that want to be in control of everything. You know that it’s just it’s just the kind of thing it becomes damaging, it becomes dangerous, it becomes painful. We see Norris City Kids Church and also control through money. So we can’t roll through saxby control through rage at that can be at all of these can be either gender. Obviously we have experience to all of them, but some Norris City Kids Church control through money and and money. It can be a fear of financial decline. It can just be that it’s the way to control, but I actually walked this out with a friend of mine, who was the sole provider of food in that house when she was the cook, should no one else in the house cook to anything. She was in charge of every single male and they were kind of on a tight budget, and so she had to cook all of these meals on this tight budget. But the thing was her. Husband would always want to tell her how many pieces of chicken to buy each week and how much macaroni is didn’t just give her a grocery budget. He didn’t control the grocery. He didn’t have a clue. He didn’t. He wasn’t having to cook, for everybody didn’t have to feed everybody. So these unnatural amounts of control and she would literally walk through the grocery store shaking knowing that she couldn’t beat her family on what he wanted her to buy and yet buying it anyway, because he had to have control over the money at their house that these things get ahold of us. It’s a snake that is sneaking into your garden and if you allow that thing, because somehow he felt more in control of the environment, if he could control the money there, women that do this and say you know situations where a man is going to work and he can’t get what he needs to get for lunch, because there’s a woman at home controlling every single cent. Where did you spend it? Where did it go and they’re just has to be some free time? It’s okay! If we have these issues in our life we have to release, then we have to get some help. We got to go like envelope. This is the budget for you this week on your way to work to your thing, this is the budget for girls. We got it just kind of take a step back because that snake, what it does it’ll just squelch the life and the next thing. You know this beautiful person that you fell in love with and that you wanted to be married to because they were special and beautiful and kind and wonderful and you like them. You have now taken the life and just sucked it out of them, and there a shell of the human that you fell in love with, and then you look at it when you say I’m bored with you and you want to go somewhere else, but you made them boring. Your control has squish the life out of there very big and they had they just feel so. Control none of their personality could even get out. So I encourage you to look into that. If there’s some of that going on in your house that get turned over by dictator and dictator, somebody will get ahold of the system. They’ll control it so long, but eventually Norris City Kids Church will only Norris City Kids Church that still have a spirit in the heart of mine they’re, only going to be controlled by another game and soul, and then eventually, they’ll come up no fights on way out of that it just it creates a ticking time bomb. The next snake that we need to kill in our garden is jealousy I’m telling you what, if you cannot go anywhere with your spouse. If there are prettier Norris City Kids Church than you in the room, then you can’t go anywhere. I mean that you would. This jealousy thing will just take over your life in the bible says again, it’s not wise to compare ourselves one with another I mean hello. If I walk into the room and I look at don, everett I’m going to feel short there’s either just I’m going to feel like a little squatty woman. You know i, don’t know dumb and jen have to be cousins. Cuz, there’s not Norris City Kids Church that don’t come out of the same bloodline.
In an area like this I’ll bet, we have a dna. We know the truth. If it’s true that jealousy going on in a marriage, we got these marriages, were they can’t even function because they’re so concerned that someone’s going to let you know that they’re going to look at somebody else and listen, this runs rampant amongst women. I promise you I have dealt with women constantly that are looking say. Did you look at her? Did you eat? What is? Are you looking at her I mean it’s just overwhelming and end so you how you can crush the head of that thing? If you want to take your heel and crush the head of jealousy, then whatever it is, if you’re jealous of finances, if you’re jealous of looks, but let’s just lose, looks as an example, you walk into a place. I do this on a continual basis, I’ll try to find one of the prettiest. You know that the prettiest Norris City Kids Church in the world are the least complement of Norris City Kids Church in the world. I’ll just go up to the prettiest person. I can find the room and I’ll say menu. Look so nice! Today your hair is beautiful. Where it, what do you know? Where did you get that top? That is a beautiful top? Why do I do that, because I am not willing for jealousy to rule and reign in my life and if I can crush the head of that thing in my heart, because it’s not about him feeling me, he can’t be good enough to me. Compliment me enough to take jealousy on my life. That is an emptiness that only the lord can feel on the inside of us and if we want to crush it-and we learn to appreciate the beauty and others, we don’t compare them to us. We learn to appreciate the beauty and them never thought about. I mean jealousy is such a nasty thing and dom was taken even outside of marriage, but a lot of the trouble family members have siblings have between each other Norris City Kids Church. Norris City Kids Church have between each other a lot of times. It’s just bull down to tell a man. That they’re living little better than I’m living there, driving a little nicer than I’m driving there getting paid a little better than me, and Norris City Kids Church don’t like being all done, and whenever we can’t rejoice in our brother, fatted calf, where ensuring that will never have our fatted cab in the future. You got to learn to weep with those who weep and rejoice with those who rejoice come on, and if we can do that, I believe god can set us up for a miracle in the future. So don’t let that jealous spirit that work of the flash get you I remember when we started the Norris City Kids Church we were young there were. There were a lot of really young girls there, a lot of pretty girls at the Norris City Kids Church and i. Remember I got him too many said man I loved the Norris City Kids Church, I’m called here. I want to be here, but my wife just won’t. Hardly let me come here. Cuz, there’s too many pretty women here and I’m like are you kidding me I mean if she’s so small I know Norris City Kids Church do that, but I don’t know that they admit that you know so. She admits that and I just thought what up? What up buying to have in your life and what a grip? The devil can get on a mind if you can’t go out because somebody’s got something going on that you don’t have on going on hey here’s number for number for this snake will destroy marriages, and that is financial, miss man, financial mismanagement, top of things. Jesse said earlier:it’s sex, it’s money and there’s a third element that that causes a lot of trouble and that is after there’s been divorced as Norris City Kids Church get married and then they’re dealing with kids from different marriages, see a lot of stress and a lot of strife and in families do to this. But we’ll just talk about financial mismanagement right now and mandy you get to. We give ourselves to those kind of teaching in the body of christ. You know the resources are there at that are out there. Things like dave, ramsey, financial, peace, just learning how to manage to take care of money. We’re generous Norris City Kids Church, but generosity won’t fix our life in and of itself. How me know you can be a great gift for god will bless your life, but you can still throw away. Everything is blessed. You with a man got that one leg which is giving and another leg, which is financial management, taking care of what god gives you any or something I think the couple’s need to have going on, and it it’s kind of a long term sneaky serpent. They don’t go to reach up and grab Norris City Kids Church later in life is sometimes there one person in the marriage that knows about the money and the other person doesn’t know, that’s fine when the bills are getting paid, but there’s going to be a day that we all would like to retire, and both Norris City Kids Church should know the plant now I know sometimes one person’s a better financial manager than the other, and you should utilize that and use that it’s just everybody being in the know. I’ll give you an example, one of my one of my dear friends that I grew up with his father worked all the time he made good money made a lot of money, but he was in the kind of job that requires a lot of overtime to produce that money, and so the guy went to work. He came home and got his chair. He went to sleep, got up and went back to work, and that was his life for 40 years and he thinks he’s doing well.
Financially, he was coming in. He was giving his wife the money and she’s be taking the bills taken care of stuff. You know the retirement, you name it and what she developed as the years went by. She developed a gambling habit and it started at the local quickie mart in all the pantry, with scratch off tickets. Remember getting in their cars in high school in there being a rolls of these tickets everywhere. Where somebody’s got this massive roll, you know where they keep get them keep get them, they were everywhere and she was disappearing and going over to evansville to the boat, and then something happened. Their house caught fire and burnt down the husband finds out she’s blown through all of his money had quit paying the insurance on the house. Wasn’t paid up. House is gone, retirements, gone everything they own is gone and within 6 months their marriage was gone, play the family didn’t make it through it and it was. It was a Norris City Kids Church financial mismanagement issue, it comes up and it bites. You money, isn’t everything, but how me know when you don’t have any of it. You got some problems in life. Come on. Somebody and so I just think it’s something couples. I mean used a couple that smarter with money that they can take care of the money, but everybody needs to be on the same page cuz. At the end of the day, if we haven’t saved it shouldn’t be at your fault, you put us in this position. It all to be our fault right. We dug ourselves into this whole together. Now will work to dig it out that away you cut off the blame game long-term, more. Norris City Kids Church The strongest things I think you can do is sit down and and take the temperature of your financial situation. You know you got to do it every so often or life just happens when you’re not taking samples. The next thing you know you know you got yourself in in a deal so money, mismanagement, i, just think. It’s huge just hear us when we’re saying this takes samples of your life, one of the biggest reasons and not every single week, but one of the biggest blessings of a weekly date is that about every third one, ryan and I will take a sample of our marriage. So we take a sample of our family, we take it, we talk about it. Do you think what do you think we’re missing with the kids like? Do you think that there’s anything that we could do better with them right now? That would help them in the season. We have to take a sample of our finances. Where are we with this? What are we doing about this budgeting thing that we need to do it? Is there a plan for this summer to take the kids on a vacation just little things? You know that need to be done, scheduling, we’re taking samples and then, ultimately, at the end of those dates. I will not the end. Usually the beginning, cuz that I don’t want to i. Don’t want to talk about it again at the movie when I’m at the chick flick, but usually at the beginning, I’ll set, we were one of us will say to the other one:hey can i. Ask you a question:do you still like me, because there is none of you have been married for 20 years and you’ve never even ask your spouse what they say to you. I love you, but you have never even asked him if they still like you, you don’t know since the day before you got married, if they liked you and you’re scared to death to ask now cuz you’re, pretty sure that the answer is no. But there are weeks that bryan says you know I like you, and they were weeks that he says you know hun i, don’t really like you this week and I’m like you know what probably for good reason like it’s been one of those weeks, I’m going to work on it and I have to repent. I have to say I’m. Norris City Kids Church Sorry I have to ask for forgiveness for things, and so does he. But when we take those samples were only 3 weeks behind you guys, you can get it get caught up on anything in 3 weeks. But if you let it go for three months, 3 years 30 years and you haven’t taken any samples, you’re way behind the ball, and you have a lot more work to do it’s much more overwhelming, so I would rather take a sample every 3 weeks then have the samples come out every 3 months or 3 years. We have to do all this massive work because the sampling coming out so with our finances. That’s the way it is. You know if we’re if we are having trouble in the financial area take me, and we probably need to call so, and so they know a little bit more about this than we do. You know what, when we were in college, we were talking about our finances, and so we just thought I would listen to dave ramsey every single day, 3 p.M. On the radio I gave myself to that. Every single afternoon, brian was still in class, I would come home. I would give I would listen every single day to everything that he said and when brian we get home, I take guess what I learned today and will, because my parents never said anything about finances me. They told me to tithe. My mom walked me through a 1-minute way to balance your checkbook and other than that there was not one word said to me about finances in my entire life and so I needed a lot of information that I didn’t have, and so I had to take the time to study those things.
If we make ourselves better, our marriage goes up. You know it is crazy. How many old would admit they like having money in taking care of money on the most important things will do in life right, but we’re not talk at bar families most the time. Nobody wants to say anything about it and it’s like man what a crippling thing to do to a child. It’s like you’re 18 go get a job and I hope you can figure out something about money and you go to school. I! Think about going through school I went, I went through school, i, have a i, have a undergrad degree and I’m off I’m halfway through something like that. Third of the way, through a master’s degree at 3 or master’s degree right now, and I’ve never had one class about money management taught at that level. It’s something that’s backwards in our in our educational system in america, but the last thing will say and we’ll be done with this session-is the last snake that that I thinking can hurt you and jump up and bite you in your marriage is the snake of secrets, everybody say secrets minutes. It’s like this. The person sitting beside me right now, I’m in covenant with it’s not just any kind of covenant, there’s old testament word for covenant laws called hessett. It’s a covenant, love love it and doors forever, and so this person beside me. We become one we’re we’re one flash that there’s no separation between brian and jesse in the eyes of god we become one and so now. Why would I keep secrets from myself? Is that keep secrets from myself all I’m doing is setting myself up for my own demise in the future, and some Norris City Kids Church been taught. You know there certain things you don’t say to your spouse, and you don’t tell him about this or tell him about that and I know what times in the natural that might even make sense, but long-term spiritually. What it can do is he can create the secret of spirit. Wear more more things are concealed as the years go by then when it starts out with small things. If you feel good about concealing small things, you can allow yourself to feel good about concealing larger thinks, how many things don’t ever start out big in life today. It’s always something small. It’s so, and it seems insignificant today, but it cracks open a door and that door for being secretive and keeping things from your spouse that can get larger and larger and larger until it becomes dangerous, but rather brian know something today that I did or that I said, or that happened in my presence or that I am privy to I would much rather him know it today from me and be a little bit embarrassed then, or him be a little bit angry, then for us to go on months months years and years for that monster to grow and for it to blow our family. This mother is to smithereen, so it’s just sometimes we have to expose ourselves. Sometimes we have to be willing to just repent. Sometimes we have to come and say I’m going to trust that you have the ability to. Forgive me enough to tell you what I did with the checkbook this week, like i, made a huge mistake and I need your help, because we’re supposed to be helping one another when we’re not hiding from what another hoping that we went, we’re helping one another and you know I used to I’m, not that was it a very small school delays to play volleyball, because we didn’t have that many Norris City Kids Church in our school. You could little girls like make it still play. Volleyball then I’m on this team and there’s a hole on the court and the ball drops on the floor. I promise you the girl, got some looks we weren’t, we weren’t happy with her. She missed the ball. She didn’t go for it. Everything was hurt. You we’re all trying to cover for her, but ultimately it was her position her spot and she should have had it. She didn’t call the ball and we’re all losing because she won’t call the ball. Guess what it’s the same in marriage whenever that ball drop, someone has to say, i, got it and go for it everybody’s running for it too sis, but at the end of the day, if you call the ball, it’s yours, you have to bear the brunt of what the end of the day is what the end is, and it is I just let the ball hit the floor. I’m not going to try to hide it. The most annoying girl on the quarter sounds like what I Norris City Kids Church thought you had it like. You don’t want that person on your team with you, because it’s like no, you called the bull. You have chicken the ball. Whenever we’re in marriage is the same, you have to get together and say:okay I’ve got this one, and then everybody support them in there getting of of what it is and if you miss it, just look up at your teammates and me and I missed it I did it i, don’t want to keep a secret from you, I missed it. I made a mistake when we do that we take all of the darkness away and we let the light expose what’s actually going on in that place. Norris City Kids Church Nothing grows like only the good stuff grows in the light the bad stuff grows in the dark and when we let the light of god in the light of truth and the light of love and all these things come in, we take the darkness away the fungus, the nasty stuff doesn’t grow in our marriage and consume, but it actually the light comes in and it takes away the stuff, that’s bad and it crows the good the good fruit, so secrets.
Aren’t that thing that we want to crush and honesty and forgiveness and and just repentance are the thing that crush it out of time for this session and I want to, but I want to pray for you for one. Second and I want to pray that the snakes would be broken out of our marriage. Somebody say amen, so that and end at the end of the next session, with will will pray for some of you. Anybody that they want sprayer but I just feel quicken and I want to pray that the snake would be taken up and removed out of our marriage. So you should go ahead and grab the hand your spouse right now and just just begin to think a man. If there’s something you need removed from your marriage, you get y’all to think about then y’all to talk about that later, but right now father. We thank you that we’ve been given authority to trample over serpents and scorpions and overall, the power of the enemy and nothing by any means shall harm us. I think you know that the serpent slithers into the garden, but that his head was at calvary cross and we declare right now. Then we submit our self to god. We resist the devil and he flees from us and we come against. Every attack of the evil want against. These marriage is right now everywhere that the the thief in the wolf and the liar and the devil would come in and try to steal, to, kill and destroy. We break its power in the name of jesus and we render it without power, broken stripped of all authority and and drug through the heavens, publicly made a spectacle of. We say that that serpents powers broken in the name of jesus christ of nazareth. We think of that secrets have no part about sweet. Thank you, but infidelity has no place in us. We declare the god of this world comes, but he has nothing in us in the name of jesus and i. Think you now the greater is he who is in Norris City Kids Church every one of these married couples than he that is in the world, and we declare wholeness. We declare grey’s, we declare peace, we declare restoration and help from in the name of jesus christ of nazareth and lord. We rejoice that the devil is bound and his power is broken off of our lives in the name of jesus break, the power of the devil off of our house and off of our marriage in jesus, mighty name and the Norris City Kids Church said amen,. Let’s give god a hand, clap that he’s going to bless our house in jesus mighty
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