Albion, Church | Going Yard

Hi there my name is nathan. My name is nathan costin over the next few weeks, they’ve asked me to speak on on mary, so this one in three more we’re going to do we’re going to do something on Albion, Church if you’re not married is fine cuz, if you I think so, the stats are probably nice. Smile percent of the people will probably get married at least once in their life, but yeah. It’s not Albion, Church. When you, when we talk when I talk about Albion, Church, you have to look at it as more than, just married tell me that it’s bigger than just you and your spouse, but we’re going to be talking about that. What the bible says about how it relates to christianity and when I say we’re going to talk about that. I will probably be asking questions, and so it’s it’s interactive, I’m, not a preacher! Honestly I’m, just a lineman, really I’m! Looking out here, I’m seeing some of you I’ve been in your driveway already before. So you know if your power goes out, I’m, usually the guy that comes to some of you guys’s house, so but I’m, not I’m, not a preacher, but we’ve been miss. You and I have been married for like 36 years, and we’ve learned a lot about Albion, Church the hard way we learn. What we’ve learned a lot about Albion, Church after we started, learn about Albion, Church, but that’s where we’re going to be coming from going to be coming from not just something, that’s red, something that you know we we picked up along the way. A lot of this stuff that we were going to be here in his is either stuff we lived or we talked to couples who lived it. You know so this is this is real stuff also I want to I want to throw out there we’re going to be using clips from the movie fireproof now yeah I know what came out several years ago. If you’ve never seen it, you need to grab a copy and take a look at it. If you saw it years ago, go ahead and get a copy and take a look at it, because it kind of gives you a refresher. When you see this thing’s you’re going to know you be more verse, but everything we talked about going to play into that and that that movie really really is a good resource. So anyhow, i, say to you and I’m proud to be here. We’re part of we’re parked across shows has a Albion, Church team and we’re part of that, and and with that, we it, along with the other couples, will meet with a couple. Some couples are struggling and we do. We do pre-Albion, Church pre-Albion, Church counseling., counseling mentoring. You know because I mean that when you get married you’re going to face some problems, it’s a man. Mad because whatever it is, and especially pre-Albion, Church when you’re, whenever you’re walking into married to me, raise your hand if you’re married I can’t see a thing of these life. Okay, whenever you got married, did you anticipate what Albion, Church was going to be like what I mean when you were at the altar and then a year later? We did it. Look the same no because it’s it’s usually not what you think about what you have built up in your head and if you don’t approach Albion, Church with a plan and if you don’t approach Albion, Church with your eyes open, even the smallest problems can turn into a crisis. You know because I don’t know why it is. But why is it toothpaste, etiquette? You know where I’m going? Why is it the person that squeezes from the bottom mary’s the one that squeezes from the middle and in one of you, will always leave the cap off and just drive the other one? That’s right make a toilet paper etiquette. Okay, there’s always the argument over the top under the bottom email, really just having toilet paper over there with because I work with a bunch of guys. I wish. You would let your guys and it’s amazing to me how you can win there. I, don’t know it. Must it’s it’s a it’s an extreme amount of effort to take the cardboard tube off and put the other one on so so, therefore, you just keep stacking on top and yeah. But when you get married, you don’t anticipate. That is a as a as a problem or is it is an issue that’s going to cause aggravation? That’s just not one of those things you think of it and then, several years ago, several years ago fell on, you got married and he and his wife had grown up together. They going to the same church they going to the same school. Their families were friends, it was great wedding. They went off on on their honeymoon and came back. Who did their house got everything fixed up and I saw him on sunday. That’s hey bro how’s married life, cuz! That’s what guys do and so how’s married life, and he said it’s terrible. It was not the answer. I was looking for. How do you respond to that? Chad I mean cuz you’re, saying I really want to go there. Cuz she’s, crazy man, she’s, crazy, I said okay. What did you do because, obviously he had to cuz I didn’t do nothing? Do you believe that I had it done something right, I didn’t do nothing. I said tell me about this. He said well, he said you know we moved in at the house. She’s got the house all decorated. She want to have some friends over so I said. Okay and she said we would. She want to go out. I said okay, so I went out there and let the grill for the came. I clean, the grill off a little bit grease on my hands went in the house and all I did was wash my hands.

All I did really that’s all you didn’t wash my hair. She came in the bathroom and she looked at me since what have you done you for an entire night? Are you stupid? She said in that she said you use the pretty towels, how many euro pretty tiles are not too many people here know what pretty toes, because I found it pretty. Towel people marry paper towel people, usually, okay, pretty tiles are the ones that you put out for the guest. I didn’t grow up in a pretty towel house, and neither did he but she did and she had her pretty towels out for when the guests showed up and he cleaned off the grill washed his hands and ride his hands off on the pretty towels, and so she had. This was sunday. She hadn’t spoken to him since friday night yeah. You can see where I’m cuz he never saw this one coming. He was not prepared for that. One right there and and here’s the thing. If you, whenever you have these little issues, if you let him go unresolved, they will snowball on you. If you’re, not careful, you’re going to start asking yourself, did I marry the right person. Could you help? You start? You start questioning it hears it here, so I’m going to tell you things that I found to be true when things I found the true is married is a whole lot, a whole lot less about finding the right person as a whole lot more about being the right person. Okay, because when you get married, you got two people that are coming into this thing from two totally different worlds and you’re thinking your worlds. Fine, it’s you right, but is it? You have to learn how to be the right person, but the problem. It is with a man with the mentoring, with the mentoring program that we would that we are involved with. We try to help the couple not only prepare themselves to learn more about each other, but we will try to prepare to learn more about themselves. Cuz, there’s a box of the program’s, pretty in-depth it goes on for about 6 months, and they learn a lot, and what we found out is is that most couples nationally you look at. If you just look at Albion, Churchs home most couples will spend a lot of time to spend a lot of money. That’s been a lot of effort and there’s been a lot of planning on one day, one day the wedding day, and they will spend practically no time planning on a Albion, Church. That’s supposed to last in the rest of life. There’s actually went online and did a little stat. Looking audience participation take a guess:what’s the average cost of a wedding in the united states today, 30 grand I got 30, do I have 40 how much 40 I got 40 anybody else. How much I wish that I told sheila is going to bring a sack of chocolate up here and throw throw chocolate to do if I do that next week? We’ll have everybody up front, you know, but $26,000 is the average. Now the majority of people in it actually went on to say the majority of people will spin around 10 grand or less you better start saving your pocket, but no more breakfast for you david, but $26,000 is the average. Now. How long does it take to plan a wedding? The year that is 6 to 12 months is between a 6 to 12 months is the average time it takes to plan a wedding in the united states. 50% of these weddings are going to end in divorce, yeah i, actually first-time Albion, Churchs that I had the first first-time Albion, Churchs is about 41%. Second, Albion, Churchs are 65% third majors or 75% law of averages of successful Albion, Church. Keep going down, as you marry more statistically say, 54% and guess how long the first Albion, Churchs that fail guess what the length of time average length of time is:i got seven 4 8, ac average. This is just a little tidbit that the hardest, statistically, you know, I need make staffs doing that you want to, but statistically the 3 hardest years or Albion, Church first year, 70 or 20 years. First, first, seven and 20 are statistically the hardest years, those the ones we need spirit. First year you’re trying to get adjusted 7th. You send it I marry right person in 20 years, you’re saying the kids are going. Who are you I mean really because you spent so much time for an all your time and effort into children? You didn’t pour any time into your Albion, Church, which is wrong, but that’s what happens you wake up, one more lacrosse breakfast they want says i, don’t know who you are and i. Don’t like you either. You know what happens. It is if you fail to plan plan to fail ssi, saying I’ve heard a long time, but if you fail to plan plan to fail, sheila and I had no mentoring. We here’s where we are. We we met, we went together like biscuits and gravy got engaged, got pregnant, got married little backwards, but that’s on its way, but that’s how it happened for us and when was a lot of our beginnings, we we actually got behind the eight-ball, because we’d we did things not necessarily way we should have done, and so with no mentoring. We all do. All we had in our picture of married was what we had seen it home with our parents and are neither one of our parents had had Albion, Churchs. That would be something you say:man, that’s an awesome. Mary’s now on the outside people would have thought so inside, not so much, and so, when we came to you when we actually got married, we had ideas of what we didn’t want to do.

I, don’t want to do this and why do want to do this, but the problem is if we knew what we didn’t want to do, we knew what we did want to do, but we had no plan on how to get there and if you don’t have a plan-and you don’t know what you’re doing and you have no direction confusion and chaos are going to show up pretty doggone, quick and and it’s going to take all your perceptions going to change before you know it all the things you find attractive about your spouse going to take a backseat. Everything is defective about yourself. You’ll have the here’s the thing I don’t mean to step on anyone who cares I’ll step on your toes, your all defective, so am i. Okay, everybody has defects. That makes you defected, but the problem it is when you get married, you start looking at their defects, yeah my son, a group of horses horses and then and I didn’t train him, but where I was around horses, all the time is always. Basically that’s really in your head can get you control the horse’s head. You control the horse, zach’s taking it to another level, because I was control the outside of the horse’s head. If you control his head out here, you can control the horse, that’s taking it to a whole new level where he can try. If you control the inside of head before you start trying to control the outside the head, it’s a lot easier to the horse, but I’m making you I’m making you the head this time good night. If I don’t have control the inside his head and I want to turn it this way, but he don’t want to turn it this way, it’s a little harder to do that if I can get inside his head. Try this way, it’s really easy to turn it this way. Now, if he should be focusing here but I want him to focus over here and I got his head all right. How do you know you got an enemy wants to take your mary’s down? Okay, he does, and so here is the things you should be focusing on your Albion, Church in your maid, but devil says no I’d. Rather you look over here. Cuz it make it it’s a whole lot easier for me to accomplish my mission and we do that all the time. We do that all the time, because we will focus on all the things that that we think are wrong with them and won’t pay any attention to the things are right. Thank you. How old are you 44? Okay, so we lose that we lose sight of what’s attractive, we lose style, and so here’s a tell me the first thing, the very first thing that attracted you to teresa what will be specific dude her lips, all right. You want me to come over here. Oh man, great short, first thing that attracted you to amy her legs. Okay, let’s face it most things. The first thing to try is usually is usually a visual for me and sheila size of her smile. She doesn’t see here’s the thing we met. She doesn’t even remember it yeah we were a teen town hit me remember, team times, okay and she’s up she’s the dark for dark-headed. Ladies especially that one right there, here’s the thing, I didn’t i, didn’t i, didn’t care. I want to dance that girl. I asked her to death. She said:okay, she we go downstairs were dancing them. She was going. Is she looking for butch? She doesn’t remember that at all. No, she doesn’t remember that i. Remember that night she does not. We didn’t actually start dating until I may be. 2 years later. You know yeah i, remember, cuz, i, remember smile. That was the first thing that attracted me to her, but promises there’s, there’s so many things that are much more attractive now than just a smile and eyes, but the same will get a hold of your head. I! Don’t want you looking at that? Okay, let’s face it lips. What take you so far? Okay, so worried about the fifth-year? Okay, chapstick! Wear off. Do you know I said it’s because because our initial attraction will only take us so far and then you got to go deeper, you know and then you have to actually start, and sometimes you have to actually start being specific on what it is. That’s attracting you to that, because a lot of things that attract you there’s so many good night there so many things that are that I find attractive that are just I’m not going to put you on the spot. Babe we’re good okay, but that woman is quirky and that’s okay, because there’s some of them quirks I find hilariously and I love them. You know i, honestly, i, don’t know what she sees in me, but I’m good and she sees it right. We asked couples all the time we do free Albion, Church of a couple asking all the time. Why are you getting married? What was the number one answer should be:cuz i, don’t have a right. We cancel the couple one time and I guess if I can’t look at her she’s, hot okay, but after 3 days of flu, that’s probably not going to be the word that comes to mind. You know you as it has to be something something deeper than just that attraction, and so probably probably most of you say well because we’re not right and which love is. Is that the one where you get on the phone? What did you have for supper? Oh I had a hamburger. What did you have? You know how this conversation goes on for, like 2 or 3 hours, i, don’t cuz I had a roommate that did this.

It was like because the conversation went about nothing, but they just had to be on the phone cuz. It was in love right and if you’re feeling this most people see you’re in love, and you should get married all your love, you I’m, you need to get married. So that’s the night I’m going to ask two questions. First, one person is what is love. What is love cuz? There was a lot of definitions out there agree or disagree. How many people know who vanessa hudgens is vanessa hudgens? Your kids know who vanessa hudgens is:okay, evans, you know who vanessa hudgens is right high, school musical sound system? If you really love someone, you shouldn’t have to work at it. Chia, okay, dry, your hands on the pretty towels and tell me if you got to work at it after that, yes, you’re, going to have to work at a big butthead. This is this is what she said in reality. There’s a lot of people out there that think that loving feelings should come, naturally in a relationship. So if you have to work at it something’s wrong, so people get married, they can okay, we’re just going to love each other forever and we’ll have loving feelings and get about a year into this thing and find out man I’m, not feeling it right now there for something must be wrong. I picked the wrong person I’m out of here, I got to go, choose door number 2. You know how many people are 50 year old, raise your hand, because you remember when love story came out, love story:oh yeah, big movie had the theme song 1 all kinds of war in the in the end. In the catch phrase, that movie was love, means never having to say you’re, sorry call police, you going to mary’s thinking that you don’t have to work at it and you don’t have to apologize and see how far that’ll take you. You know because this the problem it is cuz i, just named to close-that came out of of the entertainment, driven society we live in and that’s truth, that’s their true that they’re putting out to the people, people who have no clue on what love is they take this anything? Okay? Well, this must. This must be it because vanessa hudgens said so so so back to the question. What is love, agree or disagree. My time here, I’m getting pretty close to agree or disagree. Men and women have different ideas on how have you liked agree or disagree? Okay, because it actually, if you agreed your your thing like 70, some odd first, and they actually did a survey on this one to you know, but most people would agree that. Then women have a different view on life. Men and women communicate differently. Yes or no. Yes, I learned this one, really quick, really quick. First year, Albion, Church I say we’re living we’re living in and her parents apartment that is across from her parents backyard. We’re not even going to talk about that one right. There that’s another whole night right there. Sheila has a keys 10 days old somewhere about 10 days old and from the time he was born. Almost 10 days. What she was telling me was was I’m going to lose this I’m going to lose this baby fat. Here’s the thing I want it I’m going to bella’s want to tell you a little kernel. Truth here, hang on to this one, your wife is not your buddy. She may be your friend. She may be your best friend, I hope she’s, your best friend. She was she’s a lot of things, but she is not your buddy, because buddies are the ones that that you drink coffee with hang out around the campfire, and you know you go to work and you you throw a jab and they throw a jab at her baby last. He said that was a good one right. Okay, when you get home, we went to my dad’s and my stepmother had made her and she wouldn’t need any and reset here you take what’s left home is about half a cobbler and we take it home and we get to the house and I packed zack in a pack. The plate cuz back for the head, pack &, plays he had the entire playpen. You know packing it. In. I walk into the kitchen and there she was she’s got her a slab, a blackberry cobbler with a big ol hunk ice cream on top fixing the time that thing now I’m thinking, my wife is my buddy right she’s, not my buddy, buddy buddy says well baby. If you rub it on your hips it’ll, get there faster yeah, but right now, you’re thinking and you mentor couples. Yes, I do because we learned a lot of things. Okay, you do not say that to your wife, because what she did she know she’s a you got to know this woman she’s a peach. She didn’t say anything:she didn’t throw a fit nothing. She just looked at me. She took her bowl and she up and it it into the pan of blackberry. Cobbler picked up the pan walk the door. Looked at me open the door and it goes in the backyard I’m, not picking it up and she’s, not picking up. So so nobody picks this thing up for the for, like 3 days. Her dad her dad, you have to have been coming across the yard and just coming in the house came across the arctic in the house. Did. You know, there’s a pan of black creek I’m kind of embarrassed because he thinks it was a sore subject, because I have I made the mistake of thinking. My wife was my, but you cannot treat your wife like your body communication, but now it works.

The other way to, ladies because ladies, your husband is not your best girlfriend i. Just with your best girlfriend, you can drop a hint and she reads between the lines and she automatically knows what you’re thinking I saw its november right before christmas and you say to your husband:i was I was at by the jewelry store today and they got the prettiest tennis bracelet. There that’s your hand and your husband sneaking ballora drama wiki says you know, you know, someone sells wife made some chocolate chip cookies and brought into work, because I really don’t have a mixer heavy duty and what she saying is i, don’t like to bake and i. Don’t want a mixer and what he’s here? It is I can get some cookies if she got some new tools. The christmas morning. Guess what happens when she’s expecting the tennis bracelet and she opens up a mixer, because we think our wives are buddies. We think our husbands are our best girlfriends and we we communicate week. We can to communicate to them the way we would our friends-and you can’t do that, but the problem it is is if you don’t try to actually learn the other ones, language you’re, going to constantly be buying the wrong gift and saying the wrong thing fireproof in the clip in the clip. When we got we’ve got we got caleb and katherine and caleb is a fireman and his wife are are going through some marital difficulties, and so they both have time to friends to actually get a beat on what they need to do. Alright, you got that clip ties, I can go for it. Honey i, agree with you, you got to get out. He don’t deserve you. You can say that again, a real man’s got to be a hero to his wife before he can be the anybody else. I hear any real man, batman no I decided last night, but I’m, not the one. That’s leaving he’s the problem. Not me. That’s right, girl stand your ground, make him respect you. Albion, Church If there’s one thing a man understand disrespect, that’s the issue, that’s the reason our Albion, Church is failing. She shows me no respect at all and the saddest part about it is. He thinks our Albion, Church has been fine until this year. Now, all the sudden she goes off the deep end of a sudden i, don’t know what to think it’s easily offended and way too sensitive so insensitive. He doesn’t really care how I feel he doesn’t listen to me, even if I say it over and over and over again, and then she starts nagging me and saying:i don’t listen to her or something like that. It drives me crazy I feel like I’m going insane, but he doesn’t understand my knees. Should we are completely and totally incompatible. She’s. Probably why her friend, making me sound like a criminal i, can see him all right now, crying and having some sort of group hug. She is going to be alright. I. Don’t have a reason to return ouch. One word:yummy is a short clip minutes something seconds. Albion, Church What was it that caleb was wanting? What was it that his wife catherine was wanting love, okay, caring understanding, two different, two totally different languages and the thing what is is there are I think I think we get hung up sometime today. I spoke looted on this last year when I spoke, but there are two very distinct differences between men and women, genesis 5:2. He says he created them male and female I’m. At that right. There says he created them. Male and female. There’s two different words right. There you got. You got genesis 2:7 222, the other. The lord god formed man from the dust. Okay, that’s what it said he also for in the beast of the field, but it made a woman two totally different. How much is stop right here on what you think of god as a parent, because, honestly he was adam’s father, because I didn’t have another father, but I want you to think of god as a parent. It is, it’s always helpful if you think of we talk about here. Albion, Church We talk about papa, god and daddy got no but think of me as a parent, and he actually makes he pee pee takes adam, put you in a deep sleep and he’s going to make him somebody suitable, because adam had nobody suitable, and so he takes rib out and he makes woman I want you to think of think of him as a dad. Have you ever gone, christmas shopping and you wanted to buy the perfect gift and you knew it was the perfect gift ever seen:red, rider, okay and dads like okay, because god knew this was exactly what he needed and it’s like home and I’ve got the time fixing the school they’re going to run all over him he’s got his so anxious. I, really believe he was anxious to wake adam up, wake him up and show him what he gating. You know an adam wakes up and says:bull manny said yeah, that’s right! It’s a time thing, but you get there. That’s not what I said, but he wakes he. He wakes him up and there she is. He was a fantastic gift for a lot of reasons. One of them is, she was suitable for adam. She was, unlike anything he had ever seen, including himself. She was different I think she was different. So so, basically she was different from the start and if you look at the words, the word formed is the word yacht, sir squeeze and shake mold and mold in the shape is a potter, basically a sculpting, so he may he takes a lump of clay, makes a dirtbag scopes it breeze on it. He’s got adam, but eve is a tall is made he made.

It is totally different word, but not. It means to build piece of the time he takes out a rib, not dirt, takes out a body part and start fasting from a body part. It is if this is two totally different processes on how the how the how a man and woman are put together totally different, which you put them together different. Don’t you think they’re going to operate? Different I mean they may both be humans, but they’re operating systems are totally different. Here so now they created different, but the thought process is the way they think is totally different. Ephesians 5:33, however, each one of you must also love his wife, as he loves himself in the wife, must respect her husband. Why are there two sets of instructions? This is your part cuz. He made him different. I mean you got two different ways of thinking two different ways of doing like you’re, going to get two different sets of instructions. Albion, Church Okay, you love her. You respect him! That’s how it’s late at night, I think I I think I might have said this last year, but it’s worth repeating national survey, they ask they ask me and they’ve got a bunch of men together if you’re forced to choose between a feeling of alone and unloved or inadequate and disrespected, which would you prefer, 75% or 76% of the men chose. I would rather be alone and unloved, as opposed to be inadequate and disrespected, and then a large portion of them had a complaint saying:what’s the difference between being unloved and disrespected because that’s how that that’s the same thing for guys, but it says right there and sit on this was supposed to start I’m going to start wise here, just because it work better in the notes with a wife must respect her husband. Albion, Church What does that look like to your husband, ladies? If your married, what does that look like what does respect look like your asthma cuz we’ve asked us to couples a lot. What does respect look like and you get a blank look and think about the? If you don’t know what respect looks like your husband, then that means you don’t know how to love your husband nnnn. You can’t go to another guy and say what does respect look like to you, because the other guy may not have the same view of how he wants to be because everybody’s different right, so you have to actually talk to your husband to find out what does respect? What is me too and don’t say, what’s respect mean for you you’re on the clock, give me an answer because guys will not give you an answer right away. They may have to think about it for a day or two, but you know a lot of times. It’s like I’ll tell you when it happens, guys if you honestly, if it if she asked me that question when she does something that really makes you feel respected power when it happens it maybe three days later, it’s a no. No, no! No! No! This is what it feels like what you did right there made me feel loved and it may be the most random thing. You think that was easy. You know, but I did I would have never thought that exactly because you don’t think that way. Albion, Church This is how to reach. One of you must also love his wife there’s an inch to you know the word:agape agape unconditional love. This is agape yo, it’s a verb and i. Don’t remember much about english i. Remember now owns nouns identify, adjectives or descriptive and verbs are action and I got a po. Is a verb which means it it’s an action word you have to actually be doing something and i. This is this is really we do when we do pre-made pre-made venturing. We we tell a couple, of course, we’re not we’re, not the police. We tell him, okay from this point on your in Albion, Church crap. If you want to do this biblically, if you’re having sexual relations, they need to stop because think about this. Whenever the physical takes priority over the mental, you get things backwards. And what happens? Is you don’t you don’t talk about deep things, because you’re too you’re too focused on going on going to the physical things, and so it gets short-circuited and there’s a lot of deep conversations that never take place because you’re so concentrated on physical and mental doesn’t happen and when middle doesn’t happen, you don’t know how to love your wife and you don’t know how to respect her, because she never talked about it. Honestly, sheila and I did a lot of things that were wrong and it’s not like at the things we did right. We did because we were intentional. We just as god the grace of god I was I was in key west for several months of dating life. We actually were only together. Just a few months we were I was in key west for several. They didn’t have cell phones, long distance cost you an arm and a leg I mean really long. Distance was remember, expensive, long-distance okay, we wrote letters yeah, you write a letter to 5 days before she gets it before you get one back like 10 days. Are you actually sat down and thought you know, and so we are I think what’s best for the things that was such a did, we actually conversed on some deeper stuff in letters. You know what we want. Our hopes were, what are dreams were what we will leave our core values. Were you know that that took place there, Albion, Church so any of the middle in the middle in the physical is huge because you have to you have to get to know you have to get to know your spouse rather than just know about your spouse.

Cuz. You know a lot about them, but do you know because there’s a lot of couples been married for a lot of years and they still don’t really know him cuz. They never talk about those things for men for man, love is, is often interpreted as respect that we saw it. She appreciates me as a provider. She appreciates me as a protector. You know she appreciates my if I’m the leadership capabilities and for women love is often interpreted as a high level of emotional intimacy. He actually is that into me, because if, if your husband is actually that into you, he will probably pick up on the fact that you want a bracelet, not a mixer, because he’s lazy he’s learning to read between the because he’s into you. He will be asking questions. He will be hippy researching that out. He be digging in there he’s not just a passive guy floating along the trinity, all the train and and wife back up here, because shuts his wife out just one word answers to really heartfelt questions, and what do you feel about this i? Don’t know you know? That’s that’s really! Not! That’s! Really not digging in there and I’ve got a question if you got it says it says, if it’s just it’s in there that that he must love his wife as he loves himself and also talk to you. I love your wife as christ loved the church. My question to you is is:when was the last time jesus ever shut you out when’s? The last time you asked jesus something else:i don’t know whatever the lord and do that to you and if you’re supposed to love your wife the same way he loves us, you know, then you probably need to be actually listening and getting in there. But, ladies who says that the wife must respect your husband, proverbs 27:15 says a constant dripping. Quarrelsome wife is like a constant. We have ever has a constant dripping on a rainy day. Ladies, do not be the biggest drip in the house:okay, cuz, it’s just it’s just there and you can’t you delete a drive. You nuts or you just totally block everything out and just you just you just you know:i got a catheter. Send the video I tell him if you’ve told him to three times and he still not getting chances are number for not going to make it happen really, and if it does, it’s not going to happen in the way that you wanted to happen so I mean the dripping it it’s it’s it’s it’s and it’s biblical love. Your wives respect your husband’s. How you been? How do you go about that? Here’s, the here’s the kicker can hear criticism, don’t don’t say, is okay! Well, I can never criticize my husband, I didn’t say that, but don’t be his biggest critic, because men hear criticism as contempt. I, don’t just saying that, because I are one and I can I can take something from somebody else in that and honestly I still struggle with this one a day is, is if i, if I put it out there and she says yeah, but it’s like you know it’s automatically at my. My Albion, Church hair goes up because I don’t want i, don’t want her to be my critic. I want her to be my cheerleader, but, on the other hand, I have to get a handle on that one, because I also wanted to tell me the Truth:i’ll be there if there is a balance in there. But, ladies, if you are the, if you are the biggest critic in the room and not the biggest cheerleader in the room, you’re going to have some problems because they hear criticism, asking ladies generally hear silence as hostility. If you’re saying and you’re not saying anything, the first wasn’t, ladies. What is the first thing that goes through your mind. Your husband comes home and he’s not talking was the first thing. You’ll see mine, I can’t something’s wrong. Okay, now, what’s wrong mad, what did I do? Okay as soon as hostility, there hostility comes comes into that thing and it hostility is basically enemies, walls, opposition! So whenever you actually guys you come in your silent, she’s thinking, okay, I’ve done feeling like I’m. Now the enemy he’s building a wall up in here and in and out I’m feeling like there’s an opposition here and i. Don’t women will gimli handle that with with visible pain, you’ll see it on their face. It may be tears. It maybe there’s a lot of different ways. You can show up play, some hostility is hostility, and if your silent, you may not even you meanie upset about something, and it has nothing to do with her. But if you don’t let her in on it and let her be part of it she’s do you build a wall in and you don’t want her in there she’s going to start feeling and what’s going to happen, is usually, if she’s feeling hostility, she’s going to start asking me what’s wrong, what’s wrong, what’s wrong and she’s dripping, she dripping again, you know and you get quieter and then you get mad and you stomp, you know so you have to have to actually get a handle on on on on what respect and love is with your own spouse. This is going to this. This, basically, is maybe how they interpret love. The we haven’t even touched on what love is tonight, so I guess I got way too many notes for the time I got. Will start up there next week on on. Basically what is love we’re going to do what is love and then what’s Albion, Church for so lord jesus lord I’m, just asking that that these words I’m out of rotom downlor but I’m, asking you that that you would bless him to be yours.

What I’m asking that you would you make them soft enough to give healing and comfort but sharp enough to to punch a hole in a callous heart, lord I’m, just asking that if your Albion, Church is there that are in this room tonight that are suffering lord you, you would open your ears open eyes, open hearts and land and lord divinely poop within then what they need to be a better spouse lord not to not to find Albion, Church somebody better, but to be somebody better, but I’m asking that you just still working this 4/4 hello, gorgeous, grow Albion, Churchs within this church within this region. Ask this in jesus name

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